Below is the review I shared on Amazon and Goodreads:
“I Now Know Why I’m Resilient
And if you are a survivor of childhood trauma, maybe this book can help you understand why you can “bounce back,” and “endure” things even when you begin to believe there’s no way you can.
Reading What Happened To You? by Dr. Bruce D. Perry and the phenomenal Oprah Winfrey opened up a few windows to my heart and tapped into some areas that needed care and tenderness. I survived a whole heap of mess that could have been so much worse than it was, and I am glad it wasn’t.
Learning who we are and why we act the way we do starts with assessing what happened to us. What caused us to grow up with hardened hearts, lack of trust, unwillingness to love, fear of the unfamiliar, etc.?
This book dives into the many functions of the brain post-traumatic experiences and various methods geared toward healing and growth.
I love how both Dr. Perry and Oprah tag-team each scenario and offer their view of them and a way to move past the incidents and become somewhat whole again by learning how to regulate ourselves and gravitate toward safe spaces and environments.
If ever you feel as though you want to know more about why you continually hold on when you want to let go, reading this book is a great way to glean additional information about how you’re wired and why.
It is worth one’s time and attention, and you will certainly learn more about living through childhood trauma and how to maintain a positive outlook and a sustainable adulthood.”
Sometimes, we need a bit of guidance and a path we have not yet taken to show us who we are and why. This was “my yellow brick road.” Maybe you can benefit from it, too.
Have you gotten your copy of my new book: a collection of serial tales & flash fiction, Séduire (E-Book and Paperback) yet?
Why are we here with this topic? Well because, I am sick and tired of seeing young women well past the baby stage with baby hairs casually laid across their forehead and edges in almost every hairstyle dreamt up by current and trending stylists who want to keep this God-forsaken look alive when it should be dead, eulogized, buried, and left ALONE!
I said to my best friend and cousin in a text message the other day: “I really, really hate those stinking fake baby hairs these young women have in their hairstyles. I cringe every time I see it. *Sighs*” My cousin, ever the optimistic, responded, “It’s a fad. This too, shall pass.” It’s a fad that doesn’t need to be a fad that makes absolutely no sense.
Back in the day when this style was IN, circa the 70s, 80s, and 90s, little girls and young women actually had baby hair or slick hair with which to lay their edges and forehead. These young women are creating curly Qs and baby hairs where they just aren’t supposed to be and doing so in such a way that requires calculation and geometrical tactics, and I just have to shake my head. Exhibit A: feast your eyes on this YouTube short of someone teaching her audience how to apply baby hair to a hairstyle:
I should have prefaced this by saying if this is your thing . . . do you, boo. Please, do you. There are a ton of other things I could be soapboxing about, but this here is the hill I chose today, so here is where I stand. I love people expressing themselves in every way they choose, but what I do not like are folks grabbing hold of something they think is new and running that thing into the ground without being keenly aware of why that thing existed in the first place.
The crush’s daughter loves this baby hair trend. I told the crush how I felt about it and she is in agreement. Her response was, “You know these kids gotta do what they see others do. Makes no sense to me, but that’s how it is now.” And yes, that is HOW it is now. There is no originality, no uniqueness, no want to build and create something that may not have happened before or to at least put such a spin on that thing that folks believe it has never occurred before.
I am going to segue briefly to the fact that I encountered a clerk at The UPS Store a few days ago while mailing a package who could not read cursive. I spelled my name, my mother’s name, the addresses, etc. And she still did not type the info correctly into the system. I finally had to pull out my driver’s license, hand it to her, and say, “Please just look at my license and get my information. I’ll repeat the recipient’s info momentarily.” I was so frustrated with this child that I had to take several deep breaths when exiting the store. This is what happens when cursive and penmanship are removed from schools.
The younger generation has a foreign language before them when one writes in cursive. It’s perplexing to me, and I will never understand it!
Back to the baby hair issue. My godsister had a style with baby hairs when I went home to Savannah, GA to visit this past April, and it took everything in me not to word-vomit all over our brunch every time I looked at her. She’s in her 30s. WHY, boo?! WHY? LOL. She asked me a few times, “You okay,” and mildly, each time, I’d say, “Yeah, I am good.” Because my food was too good to allow the likes of someone else’s hair to ruin it and the mood was far too great for me to actually dampen it with something over which I have no control. I wasn’t going to rain on everyone’s parade. I know when to reel it in and act accordingly. But boy was it hard!
It is becoming evident that my generation is old and bold and the younger generations behind us are young and shunned. We can survive with little to nothing, display ingenuity when it most requires it, have lived through getting home before the streetlights came on, know what VHS and cassette tapes are, and can probably quote 75% of the movie The Color Purple (1985) without hesitating or flinching.
If you are a habitual baby hair applier, I wish you peace. I hope you find the hairstyle that fits perfectly with your face and head, and that you do not continue to beat a dead horse that should have never been resurrected. And if you intend to carry this trend deep into 2025, at least, use gels and spritzes that won’t push your hairline back five years from now. Think of your forehead, children . . . think of your edges. What have they ever done to you to deserve this?
*No baby hair was harmed, maimed, or brutally criticized outside of this post. Don’t come for me, please.*
HAPPY NEW YEAR, beautiful people! If you can’t laugh, you can’t live. Peace and blessings. And may the new year be most kind to all of you.
AD & I (left = Me. Right = AD), Saturday, December 21, 2024: Charlotte, NC. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
I dig into hearts–tear away walls, and break down the turmoil festering in a tired and weary soul. She wasn’t trusting before me . . . It’s hard to let someone in when the past has shown you more pain than joy . . . but we are m a n a g i n g.
We have deep conversations about life and the difficulties it places upon us, and I always love these discussions. “Life is a conveyor belt of challenges,” our Pastor says, and I commit it to memory because why not have something encouraging to share when the proverbial shit hits the fan?
We chilled. We relaxed. We appreciated the presence of the other and Jernee basked in the glory of her other favorite person’s smile while I kicked back and allowed the comfort of the thick and inviting couch to envelop me.
Three years later, we glide on wobbly knees, still cautious of what to say and often alerted to think before speaking. “You are a genuine person. You’re safe for me.” I get this . . . I’ve always gotten this– and it is important to be a place of peace for people who need it most.
So, we continue to tread lightly, but eager to grow into two human beings blessed by the beauty of the other–learning from the other daily. And as time passes, I pray we have the strength to fight the battles brewing in life’s crockpot of danger.
Lord knows we’re strong enough to do anything.
Have you gotten your copy of my new book: a collection of serial tales & flash fiction, Séduire (E-Book and Paperback) yet?
Walking down my stairwell one week ago. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
On Thursday, October 31, 2024, I was hired for a Patient Navigator position with HALO Precision Diagnostics (HALO DX). The company’s motto is, “Saving lives with early disease detection.”
To put it rather plainly, I will educate patients on the importance of genetic testing for early detection of various cancers (Breast, Lung, Prostate, Neuro, and Heart/Cardiac) and get them scheduled for our services.
The beautiful thing about this new career is that I will be placed at the previous facility where I worked before transitioning to a work-from-home position. I know the place like the back of my hand, and a lot of my old co-workers are still there, and are extremely happy I will be onsite again.
The process has been rigorous and I am still going through security screening for the site as a Non-exempt employee. The position is a newly created one for the host site, which is Novant Health (MedQuest) Imaging Center Piedmont and HALO DX has partnered with this site to drive home their services to qualifying patients.
Friday, December 06, 2024, was my last day with Radiology Scheduling. It was bittersweet. A lot of tears were shed and so many sweet, detailed, and loving messages were sent my way.
We had our company Christmas dinner on Thursday night, and much to my surprise, I was recognized and honored for maintaining 96% or higher throughout the entire year for QA for my calls. I handled two big markets and various modalities, and I was skilled in over 30 sets for the department.
So, maintaining that percentage range was more than impressive to the higher-ups.
I was allowed to select whatever I wanted as a gift, and being the person that I am, I opted for a Novant Health-themed hot/cold tumbler. I’m already in love with it!
We had a great time at the Christmas party and all of the higher-ups told me if this new endeavor doesn’t work out, all I have to do is call or send an email, and I would be welcomed back with open arms.
I do not foresee this new position becoming a problematic one. Everything about it has been calculated and God-led. I’ve been listening for His voice and heard it loud and clear when He advised me to hit the ground running the old-school way and apply for jobs.
Following that method led me to my old site and the center manager informed me she had a position in mind for me . . . and here, we are.
On Monday and Tuesday of this coming week, I’ll be working from home to complete the first few big training sessions for HALO DX. When we have received the notification of my screening clearance, I will be able to begin training and shadowing onsite.
I am nervous, afraid, excited, happy, and sad, but I am so ready for this change. Having worked from home for the last four years, I can feel myself becoming quite the recluse, and I am shaking myself back to some semblance of normalcy.
Whatever I can do to continue to help people in a multitude of ways as it pertains to their health and the prevention of various cancers and diseases, I am all for it!
The butterfly in me has been waiting to emerge. I am no longer cocooned, and I am excitedly waiting to see what this change has in store for me!
Have you gotten your copy of my new book: a collection of serial tales & flash fiction, Séduire (E-Book and Paperback) yet?
A Cornered Gurl 
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