Tag: Moving

A Change Had To Come

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Moving: Jernee Timid Loadholt is standing in the middle of it all while I pack up and stack boxes. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt

I had grown complacent; my time
to change and maneuver into a new
space almost eluded me.
Somehow, I found the strength
to push through fear and allow
excitement to take over.

When you’ve spent five years
in one space, you’re going to do
one of three things: remain in that
space with no intention to move,
move away from that space to find
another that will be much better, or
do something more to that space
in order for it to continue to feel
like home.

I decided it was time to move.
We’d given The Powers That Be enough
chances to right their wrongs of
our conditions and I won’t stand
for it any longer.
I prayed. I stood steadfast on my word.
I watched God work.

And now, I move.

I am fervent action in motion risking
it all for the betterment of my mind,
heart, body, and soul.
And in tow, is my senior dog who
is curious about the things
shifting in real-time before her eyes.

We are downsizing from two bedrooms
and two baths to one bedroom and
one and one-half bath — one never knows
the amount of junk one has until it
is all showing its teeth at you
while you pack it up and
put it in out-of-reach spots. . .

Cautious not to get bitten during
the process.

I am tired — no, an understatement; I am
exhausted. My body aches in places
I did not know
aches could exist, and there is still
more to do.
But I am ready.

The most important part of this
experience is that I recognize if
I opt to stay here for another year,
more pieces of me will deteriorate
into nothingness, and I intend to
keep this year easier on the ME
I am becoming instead of harder.

I claim fewer struggles.
I claim happier moments.
I claim peaceful rest.
I claim growth.
I claim pure love.

And it all starts here
and now with a change
so subtle yet overpowering,
my soul knows its power.

Originally published in soliloque via Medium.

The moving day is Thursday, August 24, 2023. I’d forgotten how much of a major task it is to move and I am being reminded of it every single day. I am attempting to see the joys of it as well as the higher possibility of sheer happiness from it, too. Thank you for reading.

the shift

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Pictured Poetry created by Tremaine L. Loadholt

the shift

He said
He would do it,
and He did.

the new place is
set for our August
move-in date; nerves
can take a backseat to
daily living.

I followed my gut,
and my gut was Him.

it was already done.
and so, it is.

Everything is set up; my name is on the unit for which I was on the waiting list, and it is ours.

On Thursday, August 24, 2023, me and The Little Monster will be moving to a community I’ve really been wanting to move to.

I’m so happy a unit is available after being on the waiting list for about a month.

I’m overjoyed. I have no more words.

NaPoWriMo #5

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on the move for a move

Generated Free Image via WordPress Images

–and the lease will terminate
in August. I refuse to stay
planted here with soaring
rates, lack of upkeep, and
trusted neighbors leaving
left and right.

the upcoming future will
find me meeting with two
different apartment communities; one near
and one on the other
side of town.

I hate moving, yet August
will come around spinning
on its heels, waiting for me
to two-step my way into
its arms.

as long as I don’t lose
an arm and a leg searching for
our new home, I’m happy
to be on the move for
a move.

A Change of Plans

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Living room view #1
Living room view #2
Living room view #3 & Jernee

After debating for the last week because my anxiety has been through the roof about this move, I’ve decided to stay at my current location. Thankfully, I recently received a raise from my job and our job is issuing significant bonuses in a few weeks and I still get my quarterly bonuses for meeting or exceeding my scheduling metrics. This takes a bit of the stress off of me financially, especially having received the raise.

I contacted my current apartment complex and thankfully, no one had leased my apartment. I renewed my lease and everything is back in order. I love my place. I love my neighborhood. I was sincerely dreading moving but without this most recent increase in income, I would have had to move.

Since I unpacked everything and got my place cleaned and back in order, I decided to rearrange my living room furniture. That’s why I’m sharing these pictures. I love the setup. It took Jernee the entire Tuesday morning and into mid-afternoon before she adjusted to the change. She is NOT a fan of change. Lol. I like it. I think I’ll leave it this way until we move in the future.

I still have a goal of moving to Asheville, North Carolina or very near to it in the next two to three years. I’m patient. I think I’m right where I need to be until it’s time for me not to be here anymore.

This is the Hard Part

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The packing . . .

The first set, placed closest to my front door.
Seven boxes probably ten more to go.

I would rather unpack any day. When packing up things for moving, there is also discarding items no longer needed, giving away other items one no longer needs, but are still of good use, and cleaning up the now empty areas along the way.

I retrieved two boxes from my local Harris Teeter and I’ll get a few more from them this week. My old co-worker has three boxes for me as well. I’ll be meeting her sometime later this week to get those from her. And into the weekend, I’ll do more packing, throwing away stuff, and cleaning.

The weekend of October 22nd will be here before you know it. I have to reserve the movers, go and pay the pet deposit and pro-rated rent amount, and pack, pack, pack. Ugh. I’ll be glad when this is over and done. I am already exhausted.

Moving is not for the faint of heart or the unmotivated!

Liberation

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A Collaborative Effort With walkerjo lee|Music: Outkast–Liberation

smokemanhat
Courtesy of Erik Odiin via Unsplash

He comes —

sits real calm-like next
to Daddy, puffs out a heap of
smoke and says, “Gotta make a decision, Tony.
We bulldozing through this city block
with or without your consent.”

I watch Daddy’s eyes turn cold,
he can’t sit, can’t stand, he just
looks frozen in time. 

the man in the perfect hat

pats my Daddy’s leg once, then
lifts himself from our porch swing,
a trail of smoke follows him
down the block, connecting his
lies as it forms.

Daddy gives me a quick smile,
reassuring me.
he isn’t a big man, short and thin.
he looks like time swaying in
the breeze, waiting for a lifeboat
that’s never coming his way.

he tells me that the Big Wigs
are making us move, taking our
home from up under us.

“We got thirty days, Pumpkin.”
and, I don’t know where
we gonna go, but I hear my
Mom’s soul sigh
in the dead of night. 

if she was still alive,
she’d cut that man in the perfect hat
with her words and tell him
where he can stick his ideas.

A strip mall.
that’s what they’re building.
fifteen homes on our block
and three on the next will
be demolished in a matter of days. 

I sit and think of that smoke
and how it followed the man
in the perfect hat and I
wonder if it’s gonna come
back without him one day
and liberate us.

thirty days to go and no new home in view
wanting to stay knowing it’s time to leave
sights set on tomorrow

get a new home that fit our porch swing
a patch of dirt to grow bundles of greens
mom’s energy nearby
while i pick and pull from the stems
she keeps a watchful eye over me
while i soak and rinse in the kitchen sink
dandelions in the kitchen window
daddy’s head hangs over the daily news

we beat the thirty days

we walk at our pace
no new development looming near.

daddy gives me that quick smile
a sway in the breeze, he stands
on a sunday afternoon
a dream
memory of my mom, she stands beside us
in between

daddy washes his hands and opens the oven door
our home smells of roasting meat
that time, mom had me snapping fresh peas
our family, as whole as can be
before

home was home, our yard had a tree swing

lay mom to rest, our three turned into a two
all our memories stuffed into a one bedroom
daddy on the sofa
i have a door with a window view of a toxic factory

maybe, a strip mall in our place
won’t be so bad
mom would have the paper preparing for our new home.

i smile daddy’s quick smile, turn to the real estate section
we sit in the sun
i reassure him this time
dream big enough for us both
sure we won’t see the man with the perfect hat
gone before he returns
it is time and we will go

i know one strip mall where we won’t shop

Originally posted on Medium via A Cornered Gurl