Serenity (For Nala)

Nala, sleeping peacefully. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt

You will always be unmatched.
No other dog will come into
this Auntie’s heart the way you did.
You wrecking-balled your way
through–adamant about what
was necessary for your comfort.

Jernee hooked herself onto you
and wouldn’t let go.
She had to be around you and
follow your every move.
The jealous one hated to share
my lap but when you visited,
that’s where you found rest.
She had to get over it.

You claimed my empty guestroom
as your own, spending countless
moments of solitude with its space.
I never had to search for you,
I knew that’s where you were.
“You will be missed” doesn’t
say enough. It cannot say
all that I need it to say.

How do I tell Jernee?
What will be her reaction the next
time we visit your Mommy?
Will the silence deafen her?
Will she look for traces of you,
ever-vigilant to find them?
I don’t want to know what
this world is without the care
and comfort of a dog.

I’m glad you held time as
long as you could.
Warrior-dog, sassy and sweet,
and a safe space.
Serenity rained from your paws,
and we quickly understood the
beauty of Boston Terriers.

Oh, Nala, I don’t want you to
let go of my heart, but
I’ll have to find peace knowing
the skies opened up to
welcome a fur angel.

Rest well, pretty girl.


**Last night, Wednesday, September 22, 2021, my best friend had to put Nala down. This sweet girl had been fighting her hardest for the last three years to continue living. However, she had a seizure and was rushed to the emergency vet. It was there, the decision was made to let this sweet baby go. Those of you who have followed me for years know both Nala and Jernee as Double Trouble and I am surely going to miss her. Words cannot express how much, they simply cannot. Thank you for reading.

“GINGER! You lookin’ cute, friend!”

My best friend shared the following video with me a few days back when I was not feeling like my normal self. The day had pummeled me and I was just trying to find the strength to cook dinner and enjoy it afterward. As soon as I opened up the link, I awaited the goodness bound to attract me. I mean . . . A video call, a dog, dog’s best friends, and comedy too. What’s not to love about this video?

I have watched it at least twenty times now and each time, I laugh heartily. Ginger reminds me a great deal of my Jernee–forever giving me attitude when I want something from her but would have a royal fit if I ever ignored her. Lol.

Dog owners, I can almost feel you agreeing with me.

Let this video loan you a little sunshine.

future vacation (for Labor Day)

A Senryu, 2 Parts

a reservation
at a prominent resort
booked–me and my girl

excited for fun
in the mountains with nature
no brouhaha, please


Yesterday, I booked the hotel for Labor Day weekend in Asheville, NC. Jernee and me will be staying at the Crowne Plaza Resort. I got a great deal using Snaptravel that saved me around $260.00. I had to jump on that deal; it would have been ludicrous not to. I am excited, and I hope we’ll be able to see this thing through. I worry with these rising numbers for the Delta variant of the Coronavirus, but I am going to remain hopeful about it.

Unwell

10 Words

Jernee, sitting near my workstation–my brave girl

sweet, sweet girl
battling digestive issues
ever close to me


Jernee was having a bad day yesterday. The poor girl has a history of hemorrhagic gastroenteritis, so her belly had been acting up from the early morning hours until a little after 1:45 pm. I am so happy she’s feeling much better now.

To Love a Dog is to Grow in Love

Jernee Timid Loadholt in a Poncho. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt


A Tribute Poem

We are both aging
bones creaking, sight deteriorating
finding ourselves slower
than we once were.

I look at the brown globes
for eyes looking back at me
and remember how I felt
the first day I lifted her
to my face, nose full of puppy scent,
she saved me.
 
I crawled outside of myself
and into her heart — 
we’ve managed to keep
each other alive for nearly
thirteen years and as much as
I’d like it to be,
another thirteen will not occur.

My safe harbor, my boss
*my wife, my everything that’s perfect
and whole . . . 
sadness breaks away from
the edges of my spirit
when she lends me kisses
and I feel freer.

I let those professionals within
my organization shoot my
body up with the first dose
of their cure-all and could barely
use my left arm for three days
she knew . . . she understood . . .
she did not expect more from me.

We’re “takin’ it to the streets”
now that the sun’s decided to
shake a leg with us
and the pep in her step
gives false hope for
a decade more of her love.

I am taking what I can get,
I’d be a fool to let go of
this love, even when she’s gone,
she’ll still be here with me.

I have grown in love
because of her and
because of her, I’ll
give this love to
someone, anyone else
who may need it.


*My mom calls Jernee my “wife” at times. She typically says it like so, “You better get on back home before your wife gets mad at you.”


Originally published in The Junction via Medium.