We called him Tortoise because he taught us. —Lewis Carroll
Scattered Words: Poems for Jernee Timid Loadholt is available now! Have you gotten your copy? Hardcover|eBook
Many of you participated in choosing a “C” name for Zumi’s new friend, a beautiful toy sea turtle, gifted to us by one of my friends. From the previous post that brought on this one, the names were: Cricket, Charlley, and Coral.
I shared the post with at least ten of my closest friends and acquaintances. They chimed in with their selections, and we have named this little beauty.
And the name that received the most votes is… *vigorous drumroll*
Honestly, I am incredibly happy that this is the name most people wanted for our new little addition. Charlley was riding high initially, ahead by 4 votes, but Coral picked up massive speed from many of my friends. Cricket only had three votes by Saturday night, so it never had a chance. The end results: Charlley: 7 votes, Coral: 6 votes, and Cricket: 3 votes.
Thank you to everyone who took an interest in participating in our little fun experiment! I appreciate your presence here, and I am grateful to be able to share the little things in my life that bring me a spot of joy with all of you.
Peace and blessings.
Have you gotten your copy of Séduire: Serial Tales & Flash Fiction at Lulu in E-Book & Paperback versions, or Amazon in Paperback (only) yet?
I am on Substack as well. Poking the Bear’s Belly for Fun is a place of healing, as I discuss recent events related to my previous place of employment, including racism and discrimination, the growth I experienced after resigning from that company, and the foibles and overall experiences of life. I welcome your visit.
One of my dearest friends, Poohbs, decided to send a gift for Zumi Tye along with the items I purchased from her website. When I opened the box housing the items that would now be new features in our home, this little buddy had been wrapped separately and packaged along with everything.
I have placed the new addition in Zumi Tye’s terrarium to see how Zumi takes to it, and well… So far, Zumi hasn’t really paid much attention to it. I’m sure Zuse probably senses that it’s a toy or not a living being, but I still want to see how Zuse reacts to its presence over the next few days.
Naming things is typically my claim to semi-fame, but I would appreciate some input from all of you. I have listed three potential names for Zumi’s new friend. Which of the three should this lovely beauty of a toy be saddled with?
I hope you’ve enjoyed the photo montage I’ve created of Zumi Tye and such a wonderfully colored toy sea turtle. I’ll update everyone after the new year on which name I have selected, taking into account the input from all of you in the comments.
Have you gotten your copy of Séduire: Serial Tales & Flash Fiction at Lulu in E-Book & Paperback versions, or Amazon in Paperback (only) yet?
I am on Substack as well. Poking the Bear’s Belly for Fun is a place of healing, as I discuss recent events related to my previous place of employment, including racism and discrimination, the growth I experienced after resigning from that company, and the foibles and overall experiences of life. I welcome your visit.
Have you gotten your copy of Séduire: Serial Tales & Flash Fiction at Lulu in E-Book & Paperback versions, or Amazon in Paperback (only) yet?
I am on Substack as well. Poking the Bear’s Belly for Fun is a place of healing as I speak about recent events with a previous place of employment, as it pertains to racism and discrimination, growth from the transition after resigning from that company, and life’s foibles and overall experiences. I welcome your visit.
my baby’s prints came today…
her paws…
I’d been waiting for them
since the 12th of September.
a lovely sympathy card
accompanied the red pieces
of art, neatly tucked behind them.
every member of our vet’s office
signed it.
their words and names crowding
the corners.
I smile. I cry. I remember the
best part of my life
no longer exists.
I stand at the edge of
my kitchen, shifting on
the balls of my feet. I am
shaking. I tilt my head to
look at each print, and the
smell of Jernee wafts across
the room and lingers in the
hallway. she’s still alive
in me; she hasn’t let go.
or, maybe I’m still holding on?
Zumi pats at the glass of its
terrarium, bargaining for my
attention, and I rush over to
see what the fuss is about.
food? check. water? check.
I think it just wants to hear my
voice, so I call its name in
a sing-songy way to appease it.
Zu-mi, Zu-mi, Zuuuumiiii.
what a silly tortoise you are.
it looks up at me and then
walks with urgency to its
hidey-hole.
we all need comfort.
tortoises are not exempt.
our home is quieter than it’s
ever been. the tapping of
paws are no longer morning
gifts or late-night signals of
an impatient senior dog who
“had me at, hello.”
I don’t know what I’m doing
with this life of mine now,
I’m just mulling on—making do.
I say that all I need is work—to
keep busy, but I think I am
telling myself this because I
am afraid of what will happen
to me if I sit down and focus
on every passing thought of
a love that was the greatest
love I’ve ever known.
where will I land if I
give my heart permission to
break and stay broken?
is there a name for people
who are no longer whole
without the pets they spent
nearly two decades becoming
one with? I don’t like having to
answer the same questions
every other day: “How are you?”
How are you holding up?”
“What are you doing with
yourself now?”
I wish there was a perfect way to
say, “I am cracking and folding
into myself because somehow
I no longer feel safe alone
with my brain, heavy heart,
and dying soul. somehow, I
no longer feel safe in this
body. something is not right.
something is not right.
it’s more than losing Jernee,
it’s all the ick of the world
that is seeping into our
skin, making our veins its home.
we’re trapped.
so, sometimes, I just need poetry
when everything is wrong
around me, and there’s no
guarantee it’ll change.
I need poetry to help me
remember who… and why
I am.
Originally published in Poking the Bear’s Belly on Substack.
A Cornered Gurl 
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