Jernee Timid Loadholt: The puppy and younger years. Photo Reel Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
it’s still grief
no one prepares you for the ache you’ll feel each time digital “memories” pop into view… the love lost will always be found.
grieving a deceased pet is often frowned upon–not recognized or centered as a genuine loss. and I wonder, how can you categorize death into a hierarchy?
pain is pain is pain is pain.
Have you gotten your copy of Séduire: Serial Tales & Flash Fiction at Lulu in E-Book& Paperback versions, or Amazon in Paperback(only) yet?
I am on Substack as well. Poking the Bear’s Belly for Fun is a place of healing, as I discussrecent events related to my previous place of employment, including racism and discrimination, the growth I experienced after resigning from that company, and the foibles and overall experiences of life. I welcome your visit.
“And if I ever hurt you, I’m asking you To charge it to my head and not my heart.”
Have you gotten your copy of Séduire: Serial Tales & Flash Fiction at Lulu in E-Book& Paperback versions, or Amazon in Paperback(only) yet?
I am on Substack as well. Poking the Bear’s Belly for Fun is a place of healing as I speak aboutrecent events with a previous place of employment, as it pertains to racism and discrimination, growth from the transition after resigning from that company, and life’s foibles and overall experiences. I welcome your visit.
I am writing, compiling, and gathering poems in honor of my baby girl
Jernee Timid as a puppy. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt, Enhanced/Cartoonized by Google Gemini
I am working on a book of poems for Jernee Timid, in memory of her life and the incredible loss I’ve experienced. I am no stranger to sifting through poems; picking and choosing pieces that make the cut, and culling others that do not. These poems, though… something about not including them—the ones not making the cut, feels wrong—feels spiteful. I cannot explain it.
I wrote them during her life. I wrote them after she died. They all have a little bit of her wrapped up in them, and I can’t see myself not having them be a part of something as significant as a dedication to her time spent on earth alongside me.
The cover photo for the book is shown above. I decided to use a photo of her as a puppy, enhancing it using AI to give it a more cartoon-like feel, because the content that follows may or may not be easy to digest.
I have always written through pain—the death of my favorite companion is no different. I am writing through it. I will continue to write through it for as long as I need to do so. Jernee would understand that. Heck, The Little Monster might’ve even appreciated it.
There is a title (I will share it as time gets closer to the publishing date), and I plan to release the book in early February of next year, or toward the end of this year. It truly depends on how I feel. Who would I be if I did not publish a book of poems for the greatest love of my life? Not Tre, I can tell you that.
I will keep all of you updated.
Peace and blessings.
Have you gotten your copy of Séduire: Serial Tales & Flash Fiction at Lulu in E-Book& Paperback versions, or Amazon in Paperback(only) yet?
I am on Substack as well. Poking the Bear’s Belly for Fun is a place of healing as I speak aboutrecent events with a previous place of employment, as it pertains to racism and discrimination, growth from the transition after resigning from that company, and life’s foibles and overall experiences. I welcome your visit.
Have you gotten your copy of my new book: a collection of serial tales & flash fiction, Séduire (E-BookandPaperback) yet?
I recently signed up to write on Substack as well. Poking the Bear’s Belly for Fun is a place of healing as I speak aboutthe most recent events with a previous place of employment, as it pertains to racism and discrimination, growth from the transition after resigning from that company, and life’s foibles and overall experiences. I welcome your visit.
A friend of mine popped up to my job on Thursday to lay a care package at my feet. In it, a lovely card, fuzzy socks (my favorite item of comfort clothing!), a most suitable coffee mug, chocolate (made with oat milk), the indomitable writer and spoken word phenomenon, Lisa Marie Lovett’s (SeasonedDialogue on all platforms) book, a pleasantly fragranced candle, and a beautiful plant. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
I hadn’t realized how poignant Jernee’s death was until the people I love started gifting me things that make my heart smile.
Out of the blue, pieces of this world made their acquaintance with me. A book, a candle, a mug, some fuzzy socks, decorative window ornaments, and so much more.
How did that little four-legged creature jump into the hearts of others just as she sashayed effortlessly into mine?
To have someone pop up at the gig casually ask for you, and then unload a hug so deep it touches your soul while handing you a wicker basket full of what now connects you even more to them is love personified.
I didn’t have the words. I almost didn’t have the legs to stand on because the gesture had been a sweet blow to my heart.
I wrapped her in my arms, thanked her profusely, and assured her that these gifts will never go unnoticed. They are the divine circling us back into each other’s line of sight.
Talking points of a loss heavier than any I have ever experienced; a feature film open for all to see. There are only a few seats left at the table of love… come one, come all while there’s still time.
This friend is a former co-worker of mine. While I simply shifted back to a department where I previously worked, we are still employed by the same organization. I am now back to being patient-facing, and I no longer work from home. She still does. We correspond with each other regularly via Teams and text message; however, to see her smiling face this past Thursday, and to know just how special I have to be to her for her to tap into all the things that bring me peace and joy, lets me know that our friendship is forever.
Below is a YouTube Short of one of my favorite Spoken Word Poets, Lisa Marie Lovette, aka Seasoned Dialogue. The fact that she copped her book for me left/leaves me speechless.
Have you gotten your copy of my new book: a collection of serial tales & flash fiction, Séduire (E-BookandPaperback) yet?
I recently signed up to write on Substack as well. Poking the Bear’s Belly for Fun is a place of healing as I speak aboutthe most recent events with a previous place of employment, as it pertains to racism and discrimination, growth from the transition after resigning from that company, and life’s foibles and overall experiences. I welcome your visit.
Caison Michael’s 8th birthday celebration. My little Munchkin Man is 8 now! *SOBS* Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
Flying Time by Tremaine L. Loadholt
He’s eight now, Time flies, wow! Can’t keep my emotions intact The little ones are growing so fast I remember diaper-changing days, Now that period has flown away. I watch as he sprouts to the sky, His beauty and loving heart soaring high. Could it be just another year, One destined to leave me in tears, Or is it a momentous occasion, A turn of time with persuasion, And a final blow to my chest, OUCH!
Have you gotten your copy of my new book: a collection of serial tales & flash fiction, Séduire (E-Book and Paperback) yet?
I recently signed up to write on Substack as well. Poking the Bear’s Belly for Fun is a place of healing as I speak about the most recent events with a previous place of employment, as it pertains to racism and discrimination, growth from the transition after resigning from that company, and life’s foibles and overall experiences. I welcome your visit.
A Cornered Gurl 
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