Category: Dogs

The Proof Copy of Scattered Words is Here, and…

trE
A brief, but exciting video about receiving the proof copy of Scattered Words; however, there’s a flaw. Lol! Video Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt

4 sections. 24 poems. 9 original photos (digitally animated by Google Gemini). 40 pages. 1 dog who is no longer with us.

The tentative publishing date is still January 12, 2026, four months after Jernee’s passing. I will know more after this minor flaw has been corrected, and I request another proof copy for review.

About the Book:

In Scattered Words: Poems for Jernee Timid Loadholt, the author wants you, the reader, to experience Jernee in totality, and understand why she has lost the greatest companion she has ever known.

If you have ever grieved the loss of a pet, many of these poems will not only resonate with you, they will set up holding spaces in your mind, crawl into your heart, and retreat only when they have been commanded to do so.

You will laugh, cry, nod in agreement, and reminisce about your furry family member(s) and how they have become your strength. Grief is not linear, and every creeping moment it decides to invade your heart, there is a poem in this book to greet it.

In Scattered Words…, Tremaine celebrated, lamented, grieved, loved, and released Jernee Timid Loadholt. Every day, she will probably do these things again—not necessarily in that order.

If you have never met a dog who had the uncanny ability to be more memorable than some of the people you know, with this book of poems, you will have your chance.

Jernee Timid: posing as she normally did while in DIVA mode. I think she was probably around 7 or 8 years old in this photo. This was taken while I was spending the weekend in Savannah, GA, at my Godmother’s house. Jernee loved being there, and my Godmother ADORED her. She never let any child or other animal on her bed, but Jernee?! Jernee had free rein of her home, and if I tried to discipline Jernee within earshot of her, I got my hind-end handed to me. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt

Scattered Words is approaching its tentative release date, and I believe it will meet the deadline I have in place for it. Because I am anal retentive, I will go through this proof copy with a fine-tooth comb, so to speak, to be sure nothing else is needed before it sees the world. I truly believe this book will be my best offering to my readers/supporters yet. However, I am insanely biased about this one.

Stay tuned!

Have you gotten your copy of Séduire: Serial Tales & Flash Fiction at Lulu in E-Book & Paperback versions, or Amazon in Paperback (only) yet?

I am on Substack as well. Poking the Bear’s Belly for Fun is a place of healing, as I discuss recent events related to my previous place of employment, including racism and discrimination, the growth I experienced after resigning from that company, and the foibles and overall experiences of life. I welcome your visit.

it’s still grief

trE

a photo reel of Jernee as a puppy & a poem

Jernee Timid Loadholt: The puppy and younger years. Photo Reel Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt

it’s still grief

no one prepares you
for the ache you’ll feel
each time digital
“memories” pop
into view… the love
lost will always be
found.

grieving a deceased
pet is often frowned
upon–not
recognized or
centered as a
genuine loss. and I
wonder, how can you
categorize death into
a hierarchy?

pain is pain is pain
is pain.

Have you gotten your copy of Séduire: Serial Tales & Flash Fiction at Lulu in E-Book & Paperback versions, or Amazon in Paperback (only) yet?

I am on Substack as well. Poking the Bear’s Belly for Fun is a place of healing, as I discuss recent events related to my previous place of employment, including racism and discrimination, the growth I experienced after resigning from that company, and the foibles and overall experiences of life. I welcome your visit.

Life in Photos #4

trE

Daily photographic musings

Workout Mode. Friday, November 28, 2025. I’m on a mission. Don’t play with me! Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
Lunch: Diced baked chicken, lettuce & spinach, diced tomatoes, onions, blackberries, cheese, & ranch dressing. Friday, November 28, 2025. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
Ollie, the perfect Mini GoldenDoodle. I visited my friend/co-worker in the country (Dobson, NC, about 45 minutes away from me) on Saturday, November 29, 2025. I had a BALL! Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
Lily (or as I call her, “Lily Girl.”), a Red Golden Retriever. She and Ollie are Niece and Uncle. LOL! Lily is my friend’s dog, and Ollie is my friend’s parents’ dog. I kept thinking about how Jernee would have had a great time with them, simply lying in the grass and enjoying the sun. Saturday, November 29, 2025. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
I swear, this could be the corn field from Children of the Corn. I mean, when you’re in the country, you take photos of corn fields. You just do. LOL! Saturday, November 29, 2025. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
My Snoopy sweater, because YAAAASSSS!!! It made everyone who saw me that day smile. Saturday, November 29, 2025. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
Pond #1 along the walking trail at work. Wednesday, December 03, 2025. Pnoto Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
Pond #2 along the walking trail at work. Wednesday, December 03, 2025. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
Thursday, December 04, 2025, chilling in my dentist’s office, in the waiting area. My dental hygienist, while cleaning my teeth, kept saying, “Your teeth are just so clean, Tre. Goodness! They’re so clean.” Every time I go there, they compliment me on my smile and my teeth. My mouth is actually featured in photos on their website. Lawd, help. I’m particular about my oral hygiene. I’m SUPER DUPER anal retentive. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
Christmas Decorations at the dentist’s office. I just love their little tree. Thursday, December 04, 2025. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
In between exams at my Optometrist/Cornea specialist’s office. For those of you who do not know, I have an eye disease called keratoconus, and I am monitored twice per year to continue to keep surgery at bay. GOOD NEWS! The eyes are the same; no changes, and there’s no need for surgery at this time. The hoodie is an item created by Ernio Hernandez, a dope artist & writer, who is in a class all by himself. Dude is out in left field with his art, and I love it! Thursday, December 04, 2025. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt

Have you gotten your copy of Séduire: Serial Tales & Flash Fiction at Lulu in E-Book & Paperback versions, or Amazon in Paperback (only) yet?

I am on Substack as well. Poking the Bear’s Belly for Fun is a place of healing as I speak about recent events with a previous place of employment, as it pertains to racism and discrimination, growth from the transition after resigning from that company, and life’s foibles and overall experiences. I welcome your visit.

Scattered Words

trE

Poems for Jernee Timid Loadholt

The cover (front and back) for Scattered Words: Poems for Jernee Timid Loadholt. Photo Collage Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt

4 sections. 24 poems. 9 original photos (digitally animated by Google Gemini). 40 pages. 1 dog who is no longer with us.

The tentative publishing date is January 12, 2026, four months after Jernee’s passing.

In Scattered Words: Poems for Jernee Timid Loadholt, the author wants you, the reader, to experience Jernee in totality, and understand why she has lost the greatest companion she has ever known.

If you have ever grieved the loss of a pet, many of these poems will not only resonate with you, they will set up holding spaces in your mind, crawl into your heart, and retreat only when they have been commanded to do so.

You will laugh, cry, nod in agreement, and reminisce about your furry family member(s) and how they have become your strength. Grief is not linear, and every creeping moment it decides to invade your heart, there is a poem in this book to greet it.

In Scattered Words…, Tremaine celebrated, lamented, grieved, loved, and released Jernee Timid Loadholt. Every day, she will probably do these things again—not necessarily in that order.

If you have never met a dog who had the uncanny ability to be more memorable than some of the people you know, with this book of poems, you will have your chance.

God gifted me peace in living form, and I will never forget her, not ever.

Have you gotten your copy of Séduire: Serial Tales & Flash Fiction at Lulu in E-Book & Paperback versions, or Amazon in Paperback (only) yet?

I am on Substack as well. Poking the Bear’s Belly for Fun is a place of healing as I speak about recent events with a previous place of employment, as it pertains to racism and discrimination, growth from the transition after resigning from that company, and life’s foibles and overall experiences. I welcome your visit.

At the Mention of Your Name

trE

An audio lamentation for Jernee Timid

A cartoonized version of Jernee Timid, derived from an original photo I took of her several years ago. Google Gemini is the AI tool I used to convert the image.
At the Mention of Your Name by Tremaine L. Loadholt

Just after work yesterday, I took
the body to a place we enjoyed
for months—our sister imaging center,
to visit with previous co-workers and
staff there.
My friend’s mother—eager to see my
smiling face, and offer a hug that
said to me, “You may not be mine,
but you are mine,” awakened my
heart’s pain.

The elders, as they often do, check
on us when we need it most.
The way she tilted her head and
asked, “How are you doing?” could
not have prepared me for what
would take place next.
I knew what she meant.
I knew how she meant it.
And when your name fell from her lips,
the tears fell from my eyes.

I apologized as I am wont to do when
my emotions take over, and she held
up her hand to me and shook her head No…
”I asked you. I want to know. Don’t you
dare apologize for feeling, Tre.”
And I heard the bass in her voice, attempted
to tighten up, but also loosen up, too.

It’s still unreal talking about you and
not coming home to you.
There are far too many reminders, and
so many people who knew you.
Everywhere I turn, sadness is waiting
to string me along.
I hate that this is now what clutters
my heart—that I have made space
for pain of this magnitude, and it shifts
only when it is good and ready.

At the mention of your name, I become
puddles that plough through the depths
of powerful grief—I wade accordingly, searching
for a shore that will envelop me
and keep me safe.
I can no longer run to you for a sense
of security.
You don’t crawl into my lap for warmth
or stand at the entrance of our bedroom,
waiting for me to exit.

You’re in so many places that make
up who I am, and erasing you was
never a plan—but keeping you in all
those spaces is running over me.
And if I can be completely honest
with you, I did not prepare for you
to live and die, and live again.

And for me to live and die, and
try to live again.

Musical Selection: Elton John—Your Song

Originally published in Poking the Bear’s Belly for Fun on Substack.

Life in Photos #2

trE

Daily photographic musings

K.E. Garland (aka Kathy) of Inspirational Kwotes, Stories, & Images & I at 800 Degrees in Charlotte, NC. If you’re not aware, she is also the author of several books, most recently released, In Search of a Salve: Memoir of a Sex Addict. It was our first time meeting, and I had a great time! Photo Credit: K.E. Garland/Photo enhancement & collage by Tremaine L. Loadholt
My lunch at 800 Degrees: Meatball Parm with house fries. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
Hallway art: an image in my apartment building. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
One thing about us Southerners is that we love our chicken-fried steak, cheese eggs, and biscuits & gravy. Sunday breakfast at Mama Zoe’s, from Sunday, November 09, 2025. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
Lost chickens? They were just hanging out in front of the fitness building in the same shopping center as Mama Zoe’s. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
Lazy eye game H E A V Y. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
A sneak peek at the fit for last Saturday, November 08, 2025. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
I purchased a scalp massager from my loctician when she was done with my hair. This tool has truly become one of my favorite things to use for massaging my scalp & keeping my locs from combining or curling into one another. I have curly/wavy hair, so that can be an issue for locs. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
Zumi Tye was coming out for the morning, and breakfast is what Zuse craved. LOL! Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt
The girls: Stacey-Lou, Bella-Rue, and Rylee-Blu, my best friend, Mook’s Boston Terriers. She sent a video of them watching TV to me, and I snapped a screenshot to capture them in a freeze-frame photo. I love these little rascals, and I was able to see them on Saturday, November 15, 2025. Photo Credit: Tremaine L. Loadholt, c/o Mook’s video.

Have you gotten your copy of Séduire: Serial Tales & Flash Fiction at Lulu in E-Book & Paperback versions, or Amazon in Paperback (only) yet?

I am on Substack as well. Poking the Bear’s Belly for Fun is a place of healing as I speak about recent events with a previous place of employment, as it pertains to racism and discrimination, growth from the transition after resigning from that company, and life’s foibles and overall experiences. I welcome your visit.