Metamorphosis

A haibun, 2 parts

4 photos of me through four different phases/years of my life. Photo collage created by Tremaine L. Loadholt

If you have ever been trapped within your own body — a prisoner of it, living life the way you thought you were supposed to, then you will know a little about this story. There is nothing freer than the day you learn to release yourself from the fear that bound you to silence, and you open up your mouth to share who you actually are — who you have always been. There was no day more freeing than the day I came out publicly — sharing my bisexuality with friends, family, and Medium.

The timing was perfect — I couldn’t sit on the fine details of my life any longer, and waiting seemed senseless. I love who I am. And those who love me stuck around. Those who I thought loved me never did.

Love’s freedom is you
Soaring high in your own skin
Unafraid to live

I am not perfect. I never will be. But perfection is never what I sought in life. It still isn’t. I only wanted to live freely, unbound to chains or shackles of what society held for me — what religiosity said I should be. I can breathe and simply be without the dark spaces of a closet keeping me company. My family — knowing before I could utter the words — love me still. My friends, most in tune with my vibe before I could share my truth — care about my existence.

I have never been happier to be me than I am right now. And the shift that took place in my life because of it is something I will never forget.

Doubt has been erased
I am still so beautiful
With or without you


Originally published in CRY Magazine via Medium

Tina

A Haibun

Tina Turner, image from Smooth Radio

I have decided to give you your flowers while you’re still here. A wonder–a mystic amongst Gods and the ungodly. You have always been captivating. I never wanted to sing. I never wanted to dance. But I have always wanted to write, and you paved the way for me to have this voice–my voice in a world of chaotic flows and shiftless thoughts. You have conquered a sea of endless pain and lived to testify.

Millions of people sing your songs at the top of their lungs–breaths poured into the air that land at your feet. We still stand in awe of you; so incredibly in love with you, we speak your name . . . Tina.

Legends can be born
To be what legends should be
You are so much more


And now, one of my favorite Tina Turner songs.

Tina Turner, What’s Love Got To Do With It?

Back Then – Poem by Ali Grimshaw

Photo from author’s blog

This poem is in response to the Pandemic Haibun Challenge that’s currently underway in the publication, A Cornered Gurl via Medium.  Thank you trE for the opportunity for shared reflection. Noticings are always within reach if your eyes are open. A friend’s phone call, text photo, or cherished smile from six feet away can keep your cup from emptiness. Yet […]

Back Then – Poem by Ali Grimshaw

Many of you have seen my post here about the Pandemic Haibun Challenge that’s currently underway in my publication, A Cornered Gurl via Medium. Above is a response to it from a writer here in our WordPress community, Ali Grimshaw. I follow her for her vivid imagination, her peaceful approach to creativity, and her ability to conquer a writing prompt.

I am glad she responded and took on the challenge. Give her haibun a read, it’s definitely worth it, beautiful people.

Out of Touch – Pandemic Haibun Challenge — Becoming Unstuck

Thanks to my dear friend, Tre, for hosting this challenge! Before the pandemic, I wasn’t aware that so many people would miss physical contact with others. How could I not have known something so obvious? By not having thought about it before. I have a bad tendency to scoff at people who are touchy-feely. The […]

Out of Touch – Pandemic Haibun Challenge — Becoming Unstuck

Many of you have seen my post here about the Pandemic Haibun Challenge that’s currently underway in my publication, A Cornered Gurl via Medium. Above is a response to it from a writer here in our WordPress community, Magarisa. Mags is a dear friend of mine; we don’t need to speak every single day or week or month, but we are linked to one another in a way that cannot be described. We always meet back up in the middle, and it’s a beautiful thing.

I follow her for the peace she possesses, her love of language and sharp imagery, and her ability to single-handedly murder a writing prompt.

scarlet ~ a haibun — Mindfills

Scarlet dreams in white silence course through my veins in autumn contemplation. Will it ever be the same? Two years of you and me in our haven of unreality. Us against the virulent, vicious world. And then through the cracks of our front door, a sliver of light of tomorrows whispered, beckoned, lured, you and […]

scarlet ~ a haibun — Mindfills

Many of you have seen my post here about the Pandemic Haibun Challenge that’s currently underway in my publication, A Cornered Gurl via Medium. Above is a response to it from a writer here in our WordPress community, Sangeetha. I follow her for the depth of her words, her strength of brevity, and the creativity she wields that has no end.

This haibun touched me and moved me, and I am thankful for this community.