Hello Again, Death–You’re Uninvited

Photo by Cecily Ward via ReShot

A Lamentation

the last breath cuts
sharply — aims for
the heart

we all feel it

amazingly, suffering comes
in waves
no longer tortured by
the machines that
kept you breathing, you
can soar

how fragile the human
life — how glass-like;
the cracks and piercings
dangle as cautionary tales
to be told in the future

I said the only words 
I could muster, “I love you — 
I love you so much.”
and I did and I do and 
I always will

this world was too blind
to see a gem shining
before it — God knew this,
didn’t he?

I give myself excuses
and blink on blips of 
memories loading to keep
me above water

a foreign concept — picking up
my phone to never
hear your voice again;
no more conversations engrossed
in hilarity or tears or common
reflections of family ties

I ache all over

this is pain — the kind
that creeps in unexpectedly 
with death at its heels — uninvited
I need the calmness of 
your presence and I 
will never have that again

there are some still
adamant about this
treacherous virus being
a hoax, but let me

I’ve lost the sun
moon and stars and
nothing about it
is fake

yours was a love that
held me when I 
needed to be held, that 
comforted me in all
my weariness

who will love me 
like that again?
there are no replacements;
I knew the greatest
familial love there is next
to a mother and child

and I am glad I did

maybe you’re my angel
and if it is true — spread 
your wings around me,
ensure my actions won’t 
be what they shouldn’t

I long for you near and
can’t have you — never, 
ever, again

Originally published in soliloque via Medium.