Unintended Codependency


I never want

to be so afraid

of living

that I

s  t a y

with someone who

makes me

f e e l

like I’m dead


I know so many women who’ve found themselves in this predicament. They’ve stayed so long with their partner(s) they’ve forgotten how to live on their own and they’re willing to remain in that relationship, regardless of how they’re being treated because it’s all they know–it’s all they’ve allowed themselves to know. And the fear of failing outside of the relationship scares them more than dying within the relationship ever could.

I’ve had to leave a couple friendships because the toxicity of what they were used to seeped into the seams of who we were. It’s harmful. It’s hurtful. And it’s a hindrance on their lives and the lives of others. Sadly, no one can force them out of their situations. It’s something they have to find the strength and belief in themselves to do.

It’s something they have to believe they’re worthy enough to do.

I can only stand by and love them as I know how. I can only support them in their efforts to become better as much as I can. But I’ve learned to remove myself from situations that are out of my control and I draw the line when I’ve noticed how hard one’s efforts can be especially when they’re ignored or avoided.

I can only wish them well when nothing else works and love them from afar.

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